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I choose to interpret Maya’s mom’s reaction in the office as “Ooh, sweetie, a DOCTOR!”

Haha, that’d be cute, but like, she really cycled through her being a firefighter in Maya’s team and then Maya’s doctor before she understood that she was Maya’s girlfriend. 

And another anon:

Never got the sense that Maya wasn’t out to everyone but, the mom scene made me laugh. She was just so clueless. ‘Are you my daughter’s doctor?’ ha. But I agree that it was more ‘if X keeps you from running, then X is bad’ rather than pure homophobia from her father. I appreciated that Maya was just out and there was no discussion actually, sometimes it’s nice to see lgbt stuff be a non issue. Still want a (proper) meet the mom scene though!

For sure! I do appreciate how little angst surrounds her sexuality, there are so many kinds of LGBT people and stories out there. Like, Travis DOES have issues, and obviously Emmet, and other Grey’s characters have and some haven’t, that’s the benefit of lots of characters. 

Definitely want more scenes with Maya’s mom, Maya really does need to make up with her and it’d be great to see Carina and her properly. Would also love to see Carina’s family… Would be nice for Maya and Andrew to meet, or at least on screen.

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I was bummed-about-Happiest-Season-discourse anon and for what it’s worth I feel a lot better about it now the initial kneejerk responses have burned off & it was so successful for Hulu. Idk if that makes you feel better, but I honestly feel like the vibe around it this time next year will be way more positive now everyone’s gotten their big viral takes out of the way and people can appreciate it for what it’s actually doing instead of what they thought it was. Sorry for using you to offload :)

Ah, no problem, sorry I took so long to respond! And I do get what you mean, the discourse is moving on and it all perhaps even added to the movie’s success and I do really love that Clea’s sticking to her guns and not backing down on what she wanted from the movie, but stilllll. I just wanted to enjoy a movie. The part where the community thinks so little of us hasn’t gone anywhere, and the discourse isn’t anywhere near done for me, y’all sent a lot of asks. 😛

I don’t know if it’ll be positive next year, but it’ll probably not be as fueled by new, genuine feelings so maybe the snark’ll be fairly mild.

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The response to Harper just smacks of privilege honestly. We get a lesbian movie written by a lesbian about her own experiences and girls were just like ” nah, not good enough”. Plus I hate them objectify Riley like straight men objectify us

Hmm, I wouldn’t say that, I’ve seen people with their own tough coming out experiences or are even still closeted who didn’t like how it went down because to them, they’re in the same circumstances and didn’t do what Harper did. I still feel, though, that even when other people behave as we wouldn’t, we can still grant them compassion. I think what ended up happening, aside from a rejection of Harper as like them, is that a lot of people feel for Abby so much, even if they do feel sympathy for Harper, it’s not enough to make up for how much they see her as another perpetrator. 

And oh, I definitely don’t agree that wlw thirsting after Riley is the equivalent of how straight men objectify us. Like, thirsting, from anyone, isn’t bad in itself, it’s when it comes with a lack of respect and honestly, so much else that can be stem from societal power dynamics and misogyny, I simply can’t read that into anything I’ve seen.

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Kind of bummed out because I LOVED Happiest Season for having a little edge and weight to it, but The Discourse™ seems to have ruled against it for exactly that reason, so there’s nowhere to enjoy it with a hive. And I’m so bewildered and disappointed at the really furious dumping on Harper (read – people like Harper.), I just was caught totally off guard by how much energy people have in the stuff they say about her?!? I dont get it

I know, same! When I was watching I was like, oh, wow, they’re daring to go past the kind of vague mild nothingness you usually get at this point in these stories, they’re actually giving it weight and character, like, of course I also winced and was mad at Harper for what she was doing but I was supposed to? And then seeing her fight to overcome that then meant more. 

I was so excited for the response and just didn’t expect what we got at all. I get that this is a mix of more classic romcoms (where the poor behavior mostly involves lying) and family holiday movies (where people treat each other badly till they get to the root of whatever) and thus involved both the bad parts, but like….damn. Just really had no clue people were going to take it the way they did. And like you, I’m sad that there’s no room to enjoy it collectively now, I actually straight up blacklisted it and have been avoiding my activity feed for any comments on posts related to it, Mackenzie Davis in other media, or holiday media in general. Not looking forward to the renewed discourse next Christmas either.

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This might read shitstirry so you don’t have to post if you don’t want to – Am I nuts or is it hard to imagine Harper getting anything like the vitriol she is if the char wasn’t a gay woman? I keep seeing people who usually preach all kinds of feelgood stuff about empathy & not judging going *the fuck* IN on her, as if nobody who’s not out will see it. I’m not saying they just straight up hate lesbians, but they sure seem to have way bigger empathy reserves for just about any other situation…

Heh, that’s like daring me to post. But really, I’ll usually answer anything sent in good faith, even if I disagree, and in this case…okay, I think we can all agree that there are certain dynamics that are just inescapable in the world most of us live in. Women, gay people, and gay women specifically are not particularly favorably regarded in general, even by themselves. And this is of course not even including aspects like race or gender identity, which add their own complexity. So no, I don’t rule it out that’s part of it, there’s just more good faith and understanding afforded to certain groups.

BUT, tbh, even if that’s at work here, to me that’s not the main source of criticism, at least not the kind we’re mostly seeing and experiencing. I feel like a lot of it is coming from wlw in particular. And of course, we aren’t free from judging ourselves, but I feel like what could be happening is a level of personal identification that demands better from this character where the expectation would be lower for others. Other characters can do whatever and are granted more grace, but they’re not representing us. Because of this closeness, there may be an urge to repudiate it, as in, we would never do this, this is horrible harmful behavior and it’s insulting to associate it to us.

But just a guess at what all’s causing this reaction, heh, since it really flummoxed me. 

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With the PRT no more now I’m really wondering what S19 wants with Carina. Part of me is starting to think S19/Shondaland promoted her just so they wouldn’t have to worry about her booking something else. I love Maya and S19 enough to keep watching with or without Marina, but I feel like this sucks for Stefania. She 100% said she didn’t want to be just the girlfriend and so far… Fingers crossed they give her more to do soon

Yeah, though as an I’m actor I’m sure she knows how it goes, I’m hoping it balances out, with more screentime in later eps or at least more on Grey’s.

And another anon:

I am actually quite curious what people were expecting from stefania being a regular on station? What would she do on the show? She’s a doctor, she has no place on a show about firefighters. I just assumed she would only be there as maya’s girlfriend. Some people think they may have her be a new PRT person with Ben but I don’t think I would want her to give up being an OB doctor just so she can get more screentime. I think it would be a disservice to the character especially because she’s so passionate about the profession.

Well, people had been floating around the PRT, though that’s over now, but there’s so much that could be done. They just have to think of her as a regular character and write stories about her sometimes instead of fitting her into others’. That’s the big difference to me.

They could have her stop by more often at the station, bring food, befriend the others, moonlight as a consultant on whatever because of covid, it doesn’t have to necessarily be realistic. Even if it’s just her and Maya, she could get to have a story about her brother and have Maya comforting her. I half expected her to get maybe the same amount of time on Station 19 but then more on Grey’s, but that’s not happening either. And really, even if it was just as Maya’s gf, more than a minute’d be nice. 

I think, interestingly, having Andy move in with them is actually good for that? Because Andy will just always carry the majority of story and screentime with her, so Carina sharing that spotlight can only be a good sign.

And another anon:

Something I noticed. Carina seems to have a lot of respect for Bailey. It goes beyond than her just being her boss. They don’t share many scenes, not even on greys but I wish they would explore that.

I was like, what do you mean, one of the only interactions between them I’ve seen being where in the Grey’s premiere this season she kind of yelled at her, but right, right, the allusions to her boss and always paying attention to what she’s doing, right. And you’re right! I wish they would! Like, at the end of it, doctors or firefighters, this show is about personal relationships, so there’s always more of that if they want to write it.