coming out could go really bad for April. Not only because she would end up being an outcast, but worst case scenario it could even get violent or she could get kicked out of her house for good. It annoyed me a little bit how Sterling didn’t seem to get it. It was sweet that she wanted to date April for real, to be open about their relationship, but… the consequences.

Right! Even though the writers are addressing these possibilities, I’m not sure they’re really thinking them through? Like, they’ll write it so there are all these obstacles and it’s the triumphant end goal of the character’s arc to come out and that’ll be their happy ending and then when the camera stops rolling…what? What would have happened to that person? 

This is a particular issue that bothers me a lot and it seems to come from not just straight writers but queer people privileged enough to not have to deal with it, OR, the unlucky people who HAVE dealt with it and projected that as the desirable outcome for everyone. I still remember this scene from The Bisexual where for once, they wrote the opposite. 

In April’s case, yeah, to an outsider losing her family might not be a big loss, but it should be on her terms. Maybe she’s counting on a scholarship for which she needs to stay in school and do well, or wants to wait till she’s financially independent, or maybe she super does love her parents anyway. But that’s always narratively secondary to Coming Out, which is treated too much like this rite of passage that has to be done as soon as possible no matter the consequences and like, this is something real queer people (and the allies around them) see and internalize and feel pressured to do! Where else are they supposed to be learning how to deal with all this? Media’s still our best source.

I get why the writers do that, why people in real life encourage it, I get that side of it, it isn’t healthy, it DOES do a number on you, I’m sure it IS super freeing to come out, but it just really needs to be more nuanced than the way it’s being done right now. Like, as if it’s shameful to be closeted, as if you can’t be in a relationship at all if you’re closeted. It’s just one or the other, closet or happy out relationship.